Saying No to Cancel Culture

Cancel culture is a modern from of ostracism in which someone is thrust out of social or professional circles online through social media, in the real world, or both.  Those who are subject to this ostracism are said to be to “canceled.”  It is an act of publicly shaming another person for behavior or social media posts deemed to be unacceptable by the entity doing the canceling. 

Cancel culture isn’t a new phenomenon.  We might think it’s new, especially now that so many of us, particularly younger citizens, actively participate in some form of social media.  But cancel culture; that is, public ostracism, has been active in our society since our founding; think Nathaniel Hawthorne’s The Scarlet Letter, for example.   What has changed are the methods used to deliver the canceling.

As a university administrator, I now regularly encounter cancel culture tensions.  On campuses throughout America, students, faculty, and staff are regularly “called out,” usually through social media, for actions, behaviors, or positions that that are deemed to be offensive by the offended party.  It is toxic, dangerous behavior.  Why?  It is toxic, because its superficiality poisons relationships and communities, and it usually eliminates any possibility of meaningful dialogue or reconciliation.  It is dangerous, particularly on a college campus or in a representative democracy, because it alienates other humans, often anonymously, and makes colleagues and other citizens fearful about speaking up and sharing their thoughts and ideas.  And in an alarming number of cases, it is the primary reason why some college students have elected to die by suicide.

For our democracy to work and for a University to perform its role on behalf of our democracy, citizens and students need to learn how to think, which is a lot like learning how to ride a bicycle.  That is, there are many falls, scrapes, bumps, and bruises that take place before we gain a sense of healthy balance, and are able to ride on our own.  

Generally, we learn how to think by listening, studying, reading, and practicing; yes, practicing our ideas through trial and error, give and take, writing and re-writing.  Prior to social media, the trial and error of this kind of practice took place between a professor and a student either in the safe space of a classroom, or through the red ink critique of a research paper.  Learning how to think requires humility; lots of humility, along with trial and error, rejection and some measure of success.  And that process takes time; lots of time and maturity, neither of which are requirements to be active in today’s social media environment.  In this relatively new environment inappropriate or immature thoughts, which would previously have been red-inked or challenged in a professor’s study or classroom, are now open to public shaming, calling out, or cancelling.

But what would happen if, in the words of Professor Loretta J. Ross, instead of calling people out for comments, thoughts, or positions that are offensive to us, we, instead, called them in?  “Calling out assumes the worst,” according to Professor Ross.  “Calling in involves conversation, compassion and context.  It doesn’t mean a person should ignore harm, slight or damage, but nor should she, he or they exaggerate it.  Every time somebody disagrees with me is not ‘verbal violence.’”  In a recent New York Times interview, Professor Ross noted that “…call out culture has taken conversations that could have once been learning opportunities and turned them into mud wrestling on message boards, YouTube, or Twitter…[and as a way to prove] one’s commitment to social justice [which has] become something of a varsity sport [on college campuses.]”

So what does “calling in” look like, according to Professor Ross, who self-identifies as a “radical Black feminist who has been doing human rights work for four decades… .?”  Calling in is like calling out, but done privately and with respect.  “It’s a call out done with love,” she says.  Calling in involves conversation, compassion and context, and may mean simply sending someone a private message, calling them on the phone to discuss the matter, “…or simply taking a breath before commenting, screen-shooting or demanding one ‘do better’ without explaining how.”

Another well-known political scientist, Robert Putnam and his collaborative partner, Shaylyn Romney Garrett, offered some parallel thoughts in their recent book, The Upswing.  Upswing attempts to answer the question Putnam’s Bowling Alone left unaddressed; that is, what might be done about the atomization of American life; the death of community and the rise of Individualism?  As one reviewer put it, they charted this path from “I” to “we” and back to “I” across every facet of the American experience, but this time offered some thoughts on how to get back to “we.”  Cancel culture says “yes to me” and “no to we.”  Getting back to a “call-in” culture of “we,” requires the courage to build relationships, one person, one neighborhood, one institution—at a time.  So, how does that happen?  How do we move from a culture now largely dominated by social media and its lack of face-to-face engagement, to a “we culture,” where relationships form the foundation of civic life and community engagement?  Here are a few suggestions:

1. Follow the lead of Professor Ross; that is, if you choose to engage in social media and see a comment that “triggers” your emotions, take a breath, and make a phone call or, even better, a personal visit. “Me culture” insists that I need to blast that ignorant comment out of the social media atmosphere whereas “we culture” is a commitment to dialogue, understanding, and mutual growth;
2. “Me culture” spends a lot of time discussing how things became so bad, whereas “we culture” spends energy entertaining the wonderful possibilities of a shared future;
3. Take a social media or 24-hour news cycle sabbatical.  Personally, I haven’t watched the news since early November 2020, and I limit my involvement in social media.  I’ve also cut back on national and international news stories and have focused, instead, on local news.  When possible, I try to write notes of affirmation to people in our community that are doing good work in meaningful ways, or who have a noteworthy accomplishment to celebrate—especially young people. I am more calm and less anxious as a result of this sabbatical, and happier for the success of those around me; 
4. And, lastly, slow down; really, slow down.  Meaningful relationships; that is, the kind that form us in healthy ways take time, energy and commitment, and social media is not conducive to this kind of relationship-building.  As Arthur Brooks recently advised in his book, Love Your Enemies, “…say no to contempt.  Treat others with love and respect, even when it’s difficult.”  That’s right:  no insults, no mockery, and no eye-rolling!

Happy New Year!